feliz natal

feliz natal every one!

christmas in brasil was quite the experience. everything about it was different this year.

1. it was warm
2. i was in a different country
3. i was with a new family
4. christmas was celebrated on it's eve
5. we had dinner at 9:30pm and stayed awake until 2:30am
6. at the stroke of midnight (officially the 25th) fireworks went off and everyone kissed

there were more differences but, you get the picture.

i have to be honest and say that the past few days i have been pretty down and feeling homesick. i am sure it is because of the holidays and i have never been away from my "more familiar family" in 23 years. on the 24th i had called home and talked to mommom, tears were shed and stories were shared. i then spoke to my mom, more tears and more stories. this helped but also made it harder. once i hung up i had to finish getting ready for the party. i had cooked all day from 11am to 7pm. i was exhausted and nostalgic and wanted to be curled on the couch in saratoga with my mom and persephone watching a movie with the christmas lights reflecting on the tv.

when i woke up that morning the kitchen was frantic and it looked like the food had been thrown in every direction. i had to dive right in. my goal was to make everything vegan. in my mind i wanted to make mashed potatoes, autumn latkes with homemade apple sauce (simply because they do not sell applesauce in brasil) and brigadeiro. i succeeded in making 3 of the 4. the mashed potatoes were delicious, the latkes outstanding.... the applesauce was burnt in the boiling process and the brigadeiro, fantastic. angela had the idea of using cranberry sauce with the latkes, it was a wonderful fix. everything was a hit and was devoured in less than 30 minutes. it was nice to see everyone enjoy my vegan dishes. i tried not to say anything until after it was all gone, so as not to scare them away beforehand.

these are the wonderful autumn latkes:

and this is the brigadeiro:

it was really a wonderful christmas. i was surrounded by family and friends that care so much about me and i knew, then, how much it meant to have me here. most of them had never met me and only tia ligia and vovó had seen me when i was 4. they told me stories of how they were always waiting for me to come to brasil and of the little facts they heard of me through the grapevine. foi bom.


tomorrow morning at 6am i leave with helio for ubatuba, once again. we will be there for 10 days! after christmas everyone (well, most people) leave são paulo and go away for about 2 weeks. it will be wonderful to be at the beach and in the sun. a new place for the start of a new year. we return on the 5th and i leave for bahia on the 9th. everything is changing so rapidly. i can not believe it has already been almost 2 months. i am excited for what awaits me in this life.

feliz ano novo para você, saudade meus amigos.

the day of the waterfalls... continued

back to the car and down the busy pavement to our next beach. this one called praia do meio (middle beach) de trindade. we followed the noisy tourists down the hill until we, once again, saw the beautiful giant ocean. in front of us were 4 or 5 outrageously large boulders that were precariously positioned on the edge of the cliff. in front of them a small stream passed. we turned left and drove up the small stream followed by a bumpy trail. at this point i was used to them and held on to the "oh shit" bar located above my head. we parked under a tree and walked toward the beach. this beach was the opposite of the last. packed with people and bars and restaurants, cheesy plastic tables adorned with beer label logos, and a the black eyed peas blasting from the back of a family car.


i was hungry and craving a bowl of fresh açai. we found a place and took a seat under the shade of a "skol" umbrella. our skin sticking to the plastic chairs beneath us. the açai was cold and melty, topped with honey and granola. because the açai is so cold, the honey freezes on top of it, creating this stiff gooey substance that you can chew yet melts in the heat of your mouth. a very cool sensation. as we sat, sandra told me of the beach across the water. supposedly it forms a natural pool with no waves, but in order to get there we would have to catch a motor boat which was 15reais each. i assessed my money situation and decided that it was too expensive. we stayed and listened to "tonight's gonna be a good night" eating the soupy remains at the bottom of the bowl. in front of us the beach was not so pretty. the sand was dirty and dark tan, the water murky and filled with people, their children and dogs. the scenery beyond them, however, was heaven. we were sitting in an inlet, surrounded by mountains. the mountain's rocky boulders and cliffs lead your eye to the water. directly across the water was the other side of the "U". tons of motor boats making their way across with their passengers wearing life jackets.

we paid for our snack and headed back to the car. we drove through the tiny village of trindade. sandra stopped at a pharmacy and i looked around a little boutique. the owner of the store was a small and very tan blond woman/girl. she fashioned a silver belly ring and a matching silver beer cup. she could not speak english very well (nor i portuguese), so we spoke of this until sandra returned.

we got back on BR101, the highway along the coast line. i learned that this road takes you from the bottom to the top of brasil, twisting along the beautiful scenery. our next stop was pataty (pronounced "pah-tah-chee"). pataty is in rio de janeiro, we had crossed the state line without noticing. pataty is one of the oldest cities in brasil, the architecture is preserved by the town. any one who wishes to alter Anything about the houses must get approval beforehand. we passed a winding bay filled with islands of grass, a lone horse and dozens of colorful tugboats.


we parked and stopped for a quick bite, sharing a 30cm pastel de queijo. we walked along the tiny cobble stone streets beyond the chains where no cars are allowed. the houses were in rows, looking to be one long building, with different colored doors and window frames. sandra and naiara wanted ice cream so we stopped at a pub and sat outside in the warm air. behind us i heard "a grotesque figure" spoken in a british accent. i jumped up and ran over to the table, sitting down before finishing "where are your from?" the family of three were on vacation in brasil. the older couple, being in their 60's live in minas gerais (another state about 5 hours inland) for 6 months of the year. their son (im guessing in his late 20's) was visiting for a 2 week holiday. during england's summer the couple returns to their home in london. it was so lovely to have a group conversation with people who speak the same language. we talked so quickly, making jokes and telling stories without thought or hesitation for the right verb conjugation. it was exciting and releaving at the same time. we parted ways and walked through the town. i bought a necklace made of red açai berry seeds. they were layed out on a white sheet next to a family of native brasilian indians. we walked more and more until it looked like chuva.


we drove out of pataty, sitting silently, breathing in the smell of just before rain, listening to sandra's asian groove cd comprised of beautiful sitar songs. we sped through the forming clouds, lightning was filling the sky. 40 minutes later, we entered ubatuba. drops of water slowly made their way to our windsheild. we got home, made dinner as it poured and watched a movie in silence, letting our bodies begin to unwind from that beautiful day.

ponkan

last night i went to dinner with meus muitos amigos. all of these friends being good friends with helio. i have met them a handful of times at various parties and get togethers. the 10 of us went to diego's japanese restaurant in downtown são paulo. it has been open for about a year and a half now and it doing quite well. the place was very big and very modern with crisscrossed dark wood ceilings and art on the walls. a long sushi bar and about 20 small tables for dinning. to the right there was a wide and shallow staircase which led up to 3 huge tables that were sunken into the floor. this very much reminded me of the wonderful peacefood dinner at hangawi before i left new york. we took a seat and started ordering everything we could imagine. diego personally picked a number of vegan dishes for me to try, mainly because i could not understand the menu and mostly because it is his restaurant and he knew what would be best.

the restaurant was basically empty with one unfamiliar table. it was 10:30pm and the restaurant closed at 11. seated at the first big table was diego, his beautiful namorada Lí, her sister and namorado and 2 other friends. when they finished with their meal they came to sit at our table, the last table up the stairs in front of the window. by the time all of our food came the restaurant was empty, even the waiters and chefs had gone home. diego was now serving everyone, bringing bottles of sake and água para mim. i was the first to receive food. i was served a steaming bowl of hot tea and miso soup. sipping one and then the other, admiring it's familiar flavors. then a plate of veggie tempura for the table. the most beautiful arrangement. various veggies scattered on the plate with a fan of fried angel hair pasta as decoration. this was accompanied by small bowls of cucumber salad with sesame and poppy seeds... delicious. next came a small black plate with 4 wedges of pure white tofu topped with scallions and shaved ginger. it was honestly the best tofu i have eaten in my life. so smooth with the cleanest taste. placed in the center of the table were two steaming plates of mushrooms, or cogumelos. one was thick and meaty sliced into strips soaked in a delicious sauce. the other was made up of tiny mushrooms with tiny heads that clumped together. both outstanding but i preferred the first. then more plates arrived of colorful fishes; soft orange salmon, purple octopus, others that were pinks and creamy whites. they all dug in, with chopsticks flying everywhere. the last plate arrived, my dish. every kind of shaped sushi filled with every kind of shaped cogumelo and pepino and arroz and alga. i was in vegan heaven. the sushi is also my all time favorite. everything about the night was perfect.

the 12 of us laughing and eating and shouting and tickling. climbing under the table to sit next to the person across from us. running to the kitchen to make ourselves a fresh squeezed juice. the place was ours and we were V.I.P. some more friends popped in and out to get a peak at the wonderful night. but the 12 of us stayed with each other until our eyes could no longer stay open. we called it a night at around 3:30 am crawling to our cars and hugging goodbye.

até logo, see you soon.

www.ponkan.com.br

the day of the waterfalls

sunday, december 12th, 2010 was the last full day i spent in ubatuba. my favorite by far.


we were meant to wake up early but did not rise from bed until 11am. again we scurried to get our bikinis on and headed to integrale to have another amazing breakfast. this day i enjoyed half a papaya, and toast served with mango and cardamom jelly. the three of us enjoyed a tall pitcher of fresh squeeze carrot, orange, beet juice. luckily, that day the owners were in. the husband was cooking so was unable to say more than hi, nice to meet you, but his wife was more free to chat. she was incredibly beautiful. long brown and blond curly hair held back by a thick white head band. her face was tan and adorned a set of mixed asian eyes. she wore a deep purple, baggy tank top with her bikini showing from the sides, as well as her 8 month pregnant belly. next month she will be giving birth to a baby girl named joana luz (luz means light in portuguese). along with all of this she sported two complete sleeves of black lines twisting and curving on her skin. she is a tattoo artist, and designed her husband's sleeves as well as sandra's ankle tattoo of ubatuba's foliage. beautiful tattoos like these make me want to have them all over my body. but i am not prepared to make such a statement.

we were on our way north, passing all the beaches we had visited the previous day. we twisted along the road through mountain after mountain with more mountains in the distance. the weather was incredible. perfect really. beautiful clouds without the wet feeling of the day before, and so so hot. just the way i like it. i have found that most of the days are overcast here in são paulo, which makes me feel tired. i often get a headache at the peak of the day and am ready for bed at 7pm. i much more prefer these hot days of perfect sunshine.

our first stop was cachoeira da escada, waterfall of stairs. i have never really seen a waterfall before this one, and this one was incredible. we pulled off the road and parked in front of two small huts. one selling tapestries and the other food and drinks. above them through the parting trees i spotted the tall tall waterfall. it's water shooting out over the rocks and falling fearlessly below. we walked through the huts and came to a bridge constructed of bamboo. the waterfall was far more grand, having two heads. the hidden one was even bigger, crashing crashing down to the rock slides below, forming little pools that lead to the river that passed under the bridge. two other families were already enjoying this natural beauty. we took our shoes off and walked to the rocks. sandra asked if i wanted to climb the waterfall but i said that i didnt feel like getting wet. naiara was already swimming in one of the pools. with each rock i climbed and each stream i passed, more and more pieces of clothing were flung to the side. the water was huge and heavy and strong. it could kill you in a second if it wanted to. we climbed, carefully, up... trying not to slip on or between the moving rock face. i had to climb on all fours, using every part of my body as resistance to the water and moss below my feet. my heart was pounding. one wrong step and i would crash and slide to my death. i realized how small i really am. we were heading to the first head, the one seen from the car. the other, was far more dangerous and was occupied by two small boys pretending to be super heroes. i stepped and pulled and smiled until i was there. standing next to the pouring water. sandra went first, and i followed. i stood under the water as it pounded my body. i felt so nervous and calm at the same time. the water so sensual, hydrating my skin and soul, yet pushing past with no regard. we climbed back down and played in the pools. we got back to the car feeling alive and refreshed. smiling and ready for the next.


we drove a bit more, about 15-20 minutes, and ended up in rio de janeiro, at a beach called trindade. we parked the car on the side of the road as other tourists kept going. we entered a small trail hidden by the large leaves and vines. the trail was rugged, bumpy, muddy, and narrow. we walked down in single file line, stepping carefully. down, down, down, down. we walked for about 10 minutes. every so often the trail would come to a fork and we would take a right, every time. finally i could hear the ocean. i could see small flecks of light blue through the thick deep green. there it was. praia brava de trindade (mad beach of trindade). we stood on the sloped rock face looking out in front of us. there was a small and shallow fresh water stream, then a 3ft sand wall with layer upon layer of dark and light tan. next came the white sand which lead to the water. calm, light blue, clear water. we climbed the wall ran down the beach, dropping our things behind us. into the water we went. it was warm and refreshing, clear as could be, and unexpectedly very salty. we were the only people on this magnificent beach. the 3 of us turned in the water, taking in the 360* view. we stared out at the open and empty atlantic ocean, turning to the left we began to see the mountain that crept into the water. the giant rock, covered in trees of every shade of green in every kind of texture, began to grow and grow bigger and taller. the blue sky meeting the mountain, meeting the sand, meeting the water, meeting us. turning still, we ended again with the empty blue upon blue. our 3 tiny selves swam and floated and dove under waves, feeling the water grab our bodies. a family passed on the sand and headed up the trail. we left the water and walked up the hot sand to lay down beneath the trees. here we rested before entering the trail to begin our climb upward.



the first split we came to we went right, instead of the needed left to head back to the car. down, down, we went again. i began to hear crashing water, but i knew it was not the ocean. cachoeira da brava (waterfall of brava) was sandra's favorite waterfall. it was so much smaller than the first one, but just as powerful. we climbed across it's rocks and down to meet the falling water. each of us took a turn sitting beneath it. i was afraid to surrender beneath the pounding water, so sandra held my hand as i eased back and down to meet the rock. once i was there my body became like the rock. all of my muscles tightened to resist the beating upon my head and shoulders. my eyes wide and fluttering with my mouth open gasping for air like a small baby put under the shower head. another couple came and i took some pictures before giving them a turn. we climbed up and up and up and up and up. out of breath we came to the car. "valeu?" sandra asked. "was it worth it?", "ótimo" i replied.


the day continued, but that's enough for now...

ubatuba

i met sandra and naiara and began the 3 hour ride to Ubatuba on friday afternoon. one hour was spent on the highway with tons of são paulo traffic, the rest on the most beautiful ride of my life. through the mountainous country side passing ever shade of green and deep reds. i saw tiny towns scattered with small houses and empty grass fields. forests of eucalyptus trees that are planted and harvested for their wood. rolling clouds that lined the horizon. we climbed higher and higher into the mountains. my ears began to pop and the fog began to form. we were now driving amongst the clouds. the moist air clinging to the car and my hand as we twisted and curved on the winding road that began our descent to the shore.


this journal entry is from my first full day in Ubatuba. saturday, december 11th, 2010.

"today i woke up very early feeling cold and damp and sticky. i was tired but had to pee, so i got up with my eyes closed and went to the bathroom. i went back to bed only to awake a bit later to a crazy sound, much like the sound of an electric beater or hair dryer in the next room. i realized that it was some kind of animal or insect and fell back asleep. i had dreams of kate and michael-lynne trying on clothes in a fancy dressing room. i awoke to helio calling at about 9:30am, but i was so asleep that it was not much of a conversation. i slept a bit more because i could tell that no one else was awake. i awkwardly twisted and turned in my wet feeling sheets, trying to feel warmth but keep my skin from sticking to itself. sandra had told me that here in Ubatuba they call it Ubachuva (chuva is rain) because it rains A LOT here, or at least always feels wet. at about 10 o'clock i got out of bed feeling tired and lazy, i went xixi then heard sandra leave her room. she told me to get my bikini on and get ready to go."

this is sandra's house. very cozy and decorated with beautiful things that she had collected while in india. the house is very close to the beach. the crazy sounding "thing" mentioned above turned out to be an insect. the locals use it as a rain timer. depending on the start and duration of it's song, you can tell when it will begin to rain. also, "chuva" is pronounced "shuva."

"we left the house in a flash and went for breakfast at her friend's organic restaurant, "integrale". it was lovely, with a beautiful garden and outside seating only. the fabrics were bright and floral with a vintage feeling. beams for the ceiling with sheer white beach wraps draped among them. inside was the kitchen and check-out. i ordered a "recheado doce de leite com cacau é castanha" a whole grain bread with coco and burnt sugar with some kind of creamy white sugar substance baked inside. i also got a dish of smashed banana topped with honey and fresh oats, which was excellent."


"then we were off to the beach. we drove about 20 minutes to a beach called Puruba. it was off the main road about 5 minutes. we had to drive on a sand road through a small neighborhood of little houses that were all different colors and had clothes hanging on their front porches. we parked the car under a tree and next to a small empty building. it was square and plain with no windows or doors. we got our things and headed down a small dirt path that lead us to the water. the water was still and dark, not like an ocean. on two sides there was thick green, the other sides were open and there was a small channel that lead into the ocean. then it clicked, i was looking at a fresh water river. fresh water next to salt water, i was amazed. it was separated from the ocean by a thin strip of beach. to get to the beach, we had to cross the river. when sandra told me the guy was on lunch break for another hour and we would have to swim across, my heart dropped. i told her my story of swimming in the barton springs while in texas with hughie when i felt something nibble on my feet. i swore to never swim in fresh water again. she laughed and said it was the only way there, offering her hand as a way to tease me. i took my first step and watched the tiny bottom-feeding fish scurry away. i remembered the saying to do something that scares you every day. so i did it. i walked across that river onto the sand of my very first brasilian beach. Puruba was quiet and empty, with only a very few people. we swam in the warm dark sea water that was filled with debris from the foliage that lined the shore. alone, i walked silently and meditatively to the end of the beach where i was introduced to a large rock. it was was tall and flat, steeply slanting upward and colored in every kind of orange, pink and earth red. covered in thin rivers that leaked into the crashing waves beneath. i attempted to sit on the giant rock but was shocked by the amount of heat it had soaked up from the sun. it stung my butt cheeks and left me smiling as i ran back to sandra and naiara. we went for one last swim before getting the boat back across the river to the car. we drove out of the tiny neighborhood and to the next beach called Promirim. we took a tiny dirt road to an even tinier dirt road that took us to a little beach bar called Osmars. here we met the owner (sandra's friend) and drank fresh juices. i had manga (mango) and sat with my eyes closed listening to the water. when my eyes weren't closed i was in awe by the mountainous islands that crept into the ocean from the left. the air was thick and salty and full of silence."



"we went back to the car and headed to the next beach called Itamambuca. we entered a small town on a dirt road with only a few small buildings of necessity. there was a grocery market, an açai hut, a restaurant, and a string of other little stores. the main dirt road turned into a terribly bumpy red dirt road. it was like a horrible ride, throwing us in every direction no matter how slow we went. finally we pulled up in front of sandra's mother's beach house, only a few houses from the shore. we quickly looked around, used the restrooms and i pulled a splinter out of the side of my right foot. we walked to the beach where there were many people for the são paulo surfing contest. we walked down the beach and followed it as it turned to the right and lead to another river entrance. we left the beach and walked around the neighborhood and stopped to see sandra's old house which she recently sold to travel the world. on the way back to the car i walked barefoot on the red muddy road, squishing it between my toes and feeling it fold away under the pressure of my body. our next stop was food at the Concha do Mar (Sea Shell). immediately, sandra ordered a 2ft palmito (palm heart) served with capers. it was so delicious and soft and sweet. palmito is my favorite food in brasil thus far. sandra then ordered 3 palmito pastel ("pas-teu"). pastel is a traditional brasilian food. it is like a large fried dough pocket filled with various things, sweet or savory. i ate it in one second."



"we drove back to Ubatuba stopping briefly to see the mangue, which is like a mixture of a swamp and a bay. i am unsure if we have these in the United States. we picked up some popsicles and watched a movie before heading to bed."

Ubatuba is very much a beach town, people walking around in bathing suits, skate boarding and riding bicycles. bikes are actually the main form of transportation. in rain or shine you will see mothers with their children clinging on, workers holding bundles of.... whatever it is they are holding and church goers dressed in their finest, peddling to salvation. fun fact: Ubatuba is the surfing capitol of brasil.

brasilian recap

i arrived in sao paulo brasil on november 11th, 2010. that was one month and 2 days ago. since then, a lot of things have happened. i am still tess, but i feel different. i feel young and naive and wide-eyed. i feel as though i just got here...which i guess in the scheme of things, i did.

on the day that i arrived, i got off the plane at 9am and saw a mountain made of deep red earth. i had never seen such a color in such large quantity. we breezed through passport inspection and customs, because, after all, i am brasilian. i was so excited to hand over my passport and receive my very first stamp, but when the woman handed it back empty i was sad and confused. my uncle explained that you do not get a stamp for entering your own country. now i have two passports that say i have been nowhere. i guess i will have to go more places.

into the car we went. i sat in the front seat as to see the view of this new land. the next first thing i saw was on the side of the highway. a little horse tied to a single tree by a piece of rope. next to this horse was a little house made of rotten sheet wood and a rusted scrap metal roof. next to this house was a little family, a mother holding her son and an older child playing next to her. they were laughing as happy as could be. within a minute later we were passing a large neighborhood filled with houses that looked like this... a favela. a lively, color filled place where the less fortunate "survive."



we kept driving. passing through the city of sao paulo. it became more and more crazy, filled with more and more crazies. people everywhere, more than new york, for sure. sao paulo is literally 5 times the size of new york. unfortunately, there is no organization whatsoever. when the city was built there was no predetermination. what i think happened was the first street was created hundreds of years ago, with people's houses and little shops for things they needed. as more people settled, they just laid out streets in any given direction to make it easier for them to get there. and then, sao paulo city was created. the public transportation is the biggest joke of all. being that there is none. ok, ok, there is a public transit but it is horribly done and horribly smelly. and don't even think about using this method between the hours of 6am-1pm and 4pm-730pm, because you will be smushed and trampled and given some awful disease. aside from public transit, most people drive themselves around this concrete jungle. the most used method is motorcycle. well, maybe more like motor-bike. they zoom around as if they were the kings of the road, beheading side view mirrors as they pass. between 3 and 5 motor-bike drivers die each day in the city of sao paulo. there is no given lane for their vehicles and they are far too impatient to drive like normal people, so they have created a lane for themselves. this lane is located between the fast and middle lane of cars and trucks. they scoot between, weaving their way through the backed-up traffic. usually carrying a box on the back used for deliveries or a brasilian girl with spandex jeans and a tribal tattoo on the lower back. in rain, or sweltering heat, they ride.


we finally made it out of the city and into the suburb of interlogos. this is where both of my aunts live with their families. for the first month i stayed with my aunt ligia and her husband rangel. they have three children, fabi, duda, and claudia. all of them are grown and have professions. my grandmother, vovo, also is staying at the house due to a bad hip.

here i spent my days exploring the neighborhood, running errands with tio rangel and "bonding" with vovo. i say this because my 81 year old grandmother can not speak more than a given 10 words of english (and i the same in portuguese) and is the most stubborn person i have met to this day. she is very loving and protective but comes from a completely different era. when she found out i was vegan she merely had a heart attack. well, first i had to tell her what that meant and then she almost had a heart attack. in her days of youth a healthy meal consisted of large quantities of meat, potatoes, rice and beans. the beans were made with meat and the rice and potatoes were made large portions of dairy. now this would be an impossible meal for a vegan to eat. however, because i am human and know how to feed myself, i was able to create something very healthy. to her, these meals were unsustainable and i was going to die at any given moment. then came thanksgiving. this was the first thanksgiving in 23 years that i had spent alone, without the company of my american family. sadly, in brasil, they do not celebrate this holiday. so on this average thursday i woke up late, waded in the sun until lunch and when the time came i sat at the silent table for our afternoon meal. there was a strange salad that was unlike what val (the house maid) normally prepared, so i studied it asking what it was about. vovo managed to motion that she had made it for me. excited but still suspicious of it's texture i pressed further, mustering out all of the portuguese that i had learned thus far (most of it being food). i asked her if there was meat or fish in the salad. "naoooo" she replied. i leaned closer, smelling it... fishy i thought, so i asked again. "naooooooooo" she said. i picked a piece out that had such a confusing substance to be any kind of vegetable. once more i asked. "nao naoooo" she affirmed. i reluctantly took a small spoonful to my plate and took a tiny bite. she had, after all made a salad for me, and i felt bad not to try it... especially if she had gone so far to make it vegan for me. just as i swallowed my first bite, tio rangel walked in the door and said "oh! you're eating the fish salad!?" OH MY GOD was the emotion that took over my body. i grabbed my plate and ran into the kitchen, disposing of everything that was there. i paced around the island counter top, boiling. i could feel the blood steaming from my pores. breathing deeply as not to scream my grandmother to shreds i walked to her and very firmly said... in english... "VoVo! you do not have any right to Ever tell me what i should and should not eat." i turned around and ran out of the house, getting lost for 2 or more hours. i sobbed the entire way, feeling betrayed and lost in this foreign country. my family.. my Grandmother! had lied... 3 times! purposefully concocted a salad of fish disguised as veggies, and then lied about it. when i got home i went to my room and made a majicjack phone call to the united states. an hour long conversation with all 28 members of my, so far away, family, just as they were sitting down to enjoy one another's company and indulge in delicious cranberry sauce with mashed potatoes.

2 more weeks past while i stayed in ligia and rangel's house. things went back to normal with vovo, the sun was beginning to shine more and more like summer. when december rolled around i decided to move to tia angela's house, where i would spend my second month. her house is literally down the street from ligia's, just a 10 minute walk at most. angela lives with tio joao, and her two sons helio and dani. she also has a daughter, fe, but she moved to florida the same week i moved here. tia angela works for herself as an interior designer so she is mostly home and we go out to do things often. while tio joao and dani work all the time, helio has a job that is a bit more relaxed. thankfully for me, but not thankfully for his wallet, he is here to spend a lot of time with me as well. we go swimming and go for bike rides around the nearby sanctuary, watch soccer and root for a team that no one likes, we go to see friends and go out to parties. a very exciting life we lead.



i am, sadly, no longer vegan. that life style lasted right up to thanksgiving. that is when i realized how hard it was for myself and every one else around me. the food that i ate had become the main topic of discussion at every single meal. every one put their two cents in, i wish it was really cents because i would be a lot more wealthy than i am now. i also felt that because every one was feeding me, and feeding me for free, i should not be so picky and make it so hard for them. now it has become more about laziness. because i gave up on it pretty quickly, i have become used to accepting whatever it is that is handed my way.... non meat things of course. but i have decided that this week, starting this morning, i am going to eat purely fruits and veggies. i have been too lenient with my diet and it's beginning to show. days filled with brigadeiro, homemade jams on fresh baked rolls, stir fry palmito with veggies and rice stuffed inside a buttermilk crepe. my mouth saying thank you! but my stomach and thighs beginning to growl.



this weekend i was invited by my friend sandra, whom i met at peacefood just before i left, to go to her house in ubatuba for the weekend with her and her daughter naiara. this was simply magical and requires an entry entirely for itself. needless to say, my tan is now officially brasilian.